Students of Alliant: Michelle Hernandez

By Ben Neale, Summer 2010

Michelle Hernandez has an undeniable story to tell. Hernandez is currently in the dissertation data collection phase of her PhD program at CSPP. In addition, she holds an internship position at CSPP’s Psychological Services Center, in Oakland, CA. This in itself is quite an accomplishment, but for Hernandez, it is only the latest in a long-series of challenges met.

Born in Concord, CA, of Mexican and Puerto Rican decent, more than four decades ago, she was one of six children in her family. After discovering that she had a chronic illness at the age of three, her father abandoned the family. The first clue of her illness occurred when her brother was playing a game they called “airplane.” As he swung her around by her wrists, she began to complain of pain. Soon after, her wrists became swollen and she developed an extremely high fever. When the fever did not subside, she was taken to Oakland Children’s Hospital, where she came down with pneumonia. She still remembers being placed in a solitary room with an oxygen tent.

It was during this hospital stay that she was diagnosed with juvenile rheumatoid arthritis, or RA. The news of this created an interest in some doctors at Stanford Children’s Hospital, where from age 3 to 18, she spent a great deal of her life.

By age 12, doctors informed her that she had stopped growing due to RA. To increase her range of motion and help ameliorate the pain caused by the condition, she participated in many therapies and had several artificial joint replacements (at first constructed from plastic, later titanium). Even with such treatments, Hernandez recalls that her pain was ever-present. Other methods of pain reduction included injections of gold dust, though she eventually built and immunity and stopped responding to the treatment. Because of her drive to achieve academically, she refused to take pain medication that got in the way of her ability to think clearly and could impact her schoolwork.

By the time she was 18, Hernandez had undergone 40 surgeries and between ages 18 and 21 she had seven more. These surgeries included two knee replacements, two hip replacements, four hamstring releases, three ankle fusions, one toe amputation, two bunion removals, one toe bone removal, one “luki-rod” insertion (for her scoliosis), one jaw replacement using her top ribs, and a halo brace implant for the break of her C2 neck vertebrae. Notably, she was the first person to ever have simultaneous knee replacements. The experience was so painful that doctors no longer perform simultaneous knee replacements. Because of the high profile nature of her experiences, doctors videotaped much of her process to be used as a training tool for medical students.

Hernandez’s resilience and positive worldview she became the perfect child spokesperson for many fundraising drives in the ’70s and ’80s. She was one of the first children featured on the first Children’s Miracle Network telethon and was featured on the cover of TV Guide, providing her with the opportunity to meet several celebrities. At age 6, she served as the poster-child for the Easter Seals organization. When she was 12 years old, Hernandez was featured in a KQED documentary depicting her unique condition and the surgical processes she went through. And at age 15, the local NBC affiliate featured her on a nightly special.

With the all the attention, Hernandez’s academic focus never wavered. She started junior college at age 18, and graduated in 1989. In the midst of matriculating through her post-secondary education, she became pregnant and gave birth to her first son in 1990. In 1996, she had another. Given her complex physical condition, both of her pregnancies were overseen by a high-risk obstetrician. Acknowledging the unique situation, she stated, “I felt it was a dual relationship in that I looked out for the baby’s health, as well as my own.”

The first 20 years of Michelle Hernandez’s life provided her with a special perspective not only in regard to physical hardships, but to the psychological challenges that accompanied her experience. Many clinicians now would not think twice of implementing mental health support services for a person in her shoes, but during her youth no psychological treatment or therapy of any kind was offered to her.

It is the latter experience that propelled Hernandez to pursue a PhD in clinical psychology. Initially, she wanted to be a medical doctor so she could find a cure for her disease. However, upon realizing the physical toll medical school and residency would have on her body (not to mention the blatant discrimination), she decided on pursuing a degree that would allow her to help other people deal with diseases like hers.

While working on her master of arts in counseling psychology at JFK University in Orinda, CA, and on her current CSPP degree, Hernandez has focused her studies on counseling individuals with physical disabilities. She has written specifically about identity development of people with disabilities, focusing on personal acceptance and positive disability identity. “Just because an individual has a physical disability, they are not someone with a disability first … a person’s disability is just one part of them,” she said.

Because very few people do this work, Hernandez has begun facilitating support groups for people with physical disabilities. In addition to addressing physical disabilities, her support group at PSC deals with the multi-stresses (low SES, person of color) that often accompany the hardships of dealing with disability. “These [multi-stressed individuals] face one of the biggest hurdles in connecting with other individuals with physically disabilities because they are isolated without access to resources,” she said.

Hernandez continues to look ahead to the future. “In doing outreach and being a positive role model for the physically disabled, I think I’m accomplishing an essential part of my goal,” she said. “Eventually, I hope that completing my dissertation will provide a unique contribution to the field of psychology with hopes of reaching an international audience.”

Despite thinking globally, she would like to remain in the Bay Area and work on writing a book, participating in the lecture circuit as a positive speaker, become a professor, start a private practice, and develop a foundation that would assist physically disabled people engage in higher education.

Specifically, she would like the foundation to focus on creating scholarships to community college. “Community colleges play a critical role in that they are usually more welcoming than traditional 4-year colleges,” she noted. “They seem to be a more inviting institution for people with developmental disabilities, learning disabilities, and physical disabilities, along with other underrepresented individuals. They level the playing field.”

While in the process completing her graduate education, her estranged father was diagnosed with terminal cancer. She used the opportunity to reunite with him and start the difficult task of forgiving him. While others turned away from him, she became her father’s primary care giver. Explaining her decision, she exclaimed, “What was I supposed to do? He’s my father.”

With that “here and now” spirit, Hernandez continues on her path. She promised her father, that in his honor, she would become the first “Dr. Hernandez” in the family. She wants to continue assisting people see the positive side of life even in the most negative circumstances.

The future will certainly hold other challenges for Hernandez, but if the past 40 years of her life are any indication, she will meet each new day with the same determination and resiliency.